Dracula’s First Flight
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Dracula’s First Flight

♪♪ Excuse me, sir? There’s a first class
passenger experiencing some discomfort in
his current seat, would it be alright
if he sat here? He’s not going to
throw up on me, is he? Oh, no, he’s harmless. Okay, well then, sure. Sir, you can
have a seat here.[horror music]You’re going to sit? You must invite me to sit. It’s okay. I invite you to sit.Can I get you any snacks,
or anything to drink?
Can I get avirgin
bloody mary please? I like the sound of that. I’ll have one as well! [sniffs] [gags]Yeesh.This blood is terrible. It’s actually
just tomato juice. Oh, well then it’s pretty
good for tomato juice. It’s impolite to stare. Sorry. What is your name? Jeremy. What’s yours? Vlad. The scourge of Wallachia. Where are you from? Detroit. What are you
doing in Seattle? What are you, some
sort of question man?Do you work
for the census? No, I’m sorry,
I’m sorry.Whereare
you from? South Dakota.. What is your pant size? I didn’t ask you that.What is your
maiden name? Van Helsing. [hissing] Excuse me. Sir, I need you
to take your seat.
Guess how old I am. [sigh] I don’t know. 37?Wrong.38. Well, you look great. You want to know my secret? A healthy diet. Wow.And I love
Mexican food. I’m not Mexican. I love Chinese food. I’m not Chinese either. I love, I–Irish food? No, no. Excuse me.Sir, I need youto
stay in your seat. Okay, yeah, alright,
I will, I just– I’m sorry, but I changed my mind. I’d rather that guy
not sit next to me. What’s the problem? I’m 96 percent certain
that he’s a vampire.Rabbit!
[hissing] 99%. Sir, I think you’re
just being racist. No, I’m not. Yep. You’re a racist. No. A big old racist. LOOK! Okay, I’m not racist. I think he might
be a little racist, but that’s further
down the list, alright, my point is,I feel
legitimately threatened,
and I am asking you,
begging you, because you are the only
person on this plane with any authority to help me.I have authorit.I’m an air marshall. Will you help me? No.I’m going to pretend
you didn’t just do that. [hits head] Ah! [hissing]Sir, I need you to
stay in your seat.
Hey everyone, thanks for
watching that sketch. Don’t forget to like,
comment, and subscribe. ‘Cause if you don’t, I’m not exactly sure
what will happen. But I don’t recommend it. Ahh.


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